Burn some bridges, Break some bonds!

2013 is fast coming to an end!

It seems like just yesterday, we screamed ‘Happy new year’ till our throats were sore, we answered so many phone calls till our phone batteries died (If you use a blackberry, you probably had to sit by your phone charger or simply let it go off and hoped you could catch your messages on voicemail). We made many promises…to family members, friends and most especially ourselves…

Well, the end of 2013 is here and some of us have probably fallen short of many of our promises, many of us are ending the year on a bad note, many of us are heartbroken, many of us are not sure of where we stand in our relationships, many of us can barely point at one friend that stood by us through thick and thin this year…as a matter of fact, many of us have come to realize we don’t have any friends, the people in our lives are more like acquaintances that come over for lunch once in a while and once they’ve had their fill, they dust off their butts and hit the road…until they receive another lunch invitation. I think it’s time to burn some bridges and break some bonds.

If your friends only call when they need something from you, it’s time to re-evaluate your friendships. Friendships are about giving; you can’t have friends that only want to take but never give. It is draining to give all the time and never receive. You might not mind doing all the giving but if your friends are never there to even ask how you’re doing or give you a much-needed hug when times are rough, it’s time to re-evaluate. Don’t drain yourself for people that don’t care.

If you’re in love and the other person is playing ping pong ball with your heart, it’s time to re-evaluate. In a relationship, you shouldn’t have to feel like a toy a child picks up when he’s interested and throws against the wall when that interest wanes. You call your partner and he/she only calls back two days later? He’s not bleeding, he wasn’t arrested, he wasn’t stuck in a den with a lion…he/she just didn’t feel like speaking to you? It’s time to re-evaluate. Ladies and men need to feel special in their relationships. No one should make you feel like you’re a burden. If they make you feel like you’re a burden, it’s time to relieve them of the load!

If you have a serial cheater for a partner, well, I don’t need to go into details here. If I could sell you enough strength and self-esteem, scratch that! If I could magically bestow them on you for free, I would! Please please, let all the madness, heartbreak and unhappiness end with this year!

If he’s stringing you along with excuses like “I really like you but I’m just not sure of what I want yet”, “I would love for us to move forward but I’m not over my past heartbreak”, “I know we’ve been together for years, I just don’t feel grown enough to make a commitment”, well, I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you you are running a big risk. If he’s not sure of what he wants, you can be assured he’s sure it’s not you! Don’t be surprised. Most of the time, men are pretty sure of what they want before they see it. And if they aren’t, they usually know the moment they lay eyes on it! So if he’s feeding you that flimpsy excuse, honeypie, you’re not it!

If he keeps saying he’s not over his past heartbreak, then it means he’s not ready for you. It’s super clear and you should see it too! if he’s saying that to you, it’s highly likely that he sees you as a rebound and he doesn’t want you to get the feeling that he wants you to stick around for long. Don’t start competing with the ‘ghost’ of his ex. Read between the lines darling and excuse yourself before you are shamefully discarded.

If you’ve been with him for years (4,5,6…perhaps even a decade) and he keeps saying he doesn’t feel ready to make a commitment, speak to him and iron it out! Chances are he has milked your ‘cow’ for all it’s worth and now he’s thinking of trading you up for a new ‘cow’. Who wants an old worn-out cow when they can have a nice young one whose talents they haven’t discovered? I recently read the story of a Nigerian celebrity whose boyfriend dumped her after dating for eleven years! Talk about a bitch slap heartbreak! Don’t wait till someone else comes along into his life and he has to tell you he no longer has any use for you! The same applies to women that string their men along and give constant excuses for their lack of commitment

2013 is ending, 2014 is knocking. There’s nothing better than starting a new year on a clean slate, leaving baggage behind and starting the year with a more improved version of yourself! Burn the unnecessary bridges you’ve built and break those bonds that only cause heart-wrenching pain! Hit the delete button if you have to, have that goodbye discussion if you think that’s best but whatever you do, give 2014 a chance for new possibilities. There can’t be room for anything new if your life is filled with old useless stuff! Clear up the clutter! 2014 is here!

xoxo

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About Demilade Fayemiwo

I am a woman on an adventure; a student of life; a voice for the hopeless. I'm a city set on a hill. Motivation is what I do; it is who I am; it is hardwired into my DNA. I can't help but get you moving!
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3 Responses to Burn some bridges, Break some bonds!

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