Think Like a Man…. ERM… No Thanks

Disclaimer: No offence to Steve Harvey’s popular book, which I did not read and no offence to the movie which I watched and enjoyed.

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These days, it is a growing trend that women want to think like men. We believe we are failing at relationships because we are not thinking like men. We want to put ourselves in the position of men, we want to make moves like men, talk like men expect us to and act like they want us to. And of course, Steve Harvey’s popular book sent many women into ‘think like a man’ mode but hey don’t forget to act like a woman…Erm, is that possible?

I am sure you are aware by now that your thoughts become your actions; why would you want to think like a man when you were created to be a woman? It just doesn’t add up to me. It is impossible to think like a man and act like a lady. Believe me, i have tried it and I know all you will end up achieving is attracting other women to you. In the midst of men, they will read your mannerisms and start to treat you like one of them; you will be another guy…why? because you think like them! You don’t understand why their girlfriends are upset because they didn’t call last night, but you understand the men had other things to attend to and couldn’t be bothered to call. Before you know it, you start to receive pats on the back and perhaps one day, they might attempt giving you a wedgie. Don’t blame them; all they see when they look at you is another man who can see things the way they do and that of course is boring to them. As much as men complain about the weird and intolerable factors that make up women, they love to be with a woman who possesses those weird and intolerable factors.

Do you think your inability to think like a man is what is standing between you and your happiness? No! Your obstacles range from your pre-conceived notions about men to your completely unacceptable attitude towards admirers, your partner and your relationship as a whole. Many of us believe all men are cheats and liars and can’t wait to jump ship once they get what they want, while many of us, though single, have anger issues for no reason. Some women are angry when a good-looking, ok-ish man asks for their number; “I don’t give my number out”…. How do you get dates then? Do you only date the guys you met in primary school? I can understand the need to be careful because there are so many psychos out there but at least, give some of your admirers a chance. You don’t have to invite him to your apartment or cook him dinner within the first few weeks of knowing him. You can take your time, but give men a chance!

Stop thinking your relationships will be successful when you think like men. No sister. Men and women are deliberately wired differently. Like an ad I saw on TV said “Men’s brains are made of little boxes and none of the boxes touch each other. Women’s brains on the other hand are made of little wires and everything is connected to everything!” That is sooo true and believe me, it wa created that way for a reason. If God felt relationships would work out well if we could all think the same way, he would have created Adam and Steve but guess what? he didn’t! He made Eve with the brain that’s made up of tiny little wires that connects everything to everything. Be yourself; love yourself, be empathetic, be compassionate, be caring, even towards yourself and the right man will be glad you don’t think like him.

xoxo

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About Demilade Fayemiwo

I am a woman on an adventure; a student of life; a voice for the hopeless. I'm a city set on a hill. Motivation is what I do; it is who I am; it is hardwired into my DNA. I can't help but get you moving!
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9 Responses to Think Like a Man…. ERM… No Thanks

  1. cyntiaonuoha says:

    Thinking like a man IS a mentality reserved for a certain type of woman. You’re a lady that’s how you’re suppose to be act and think. A lot of those rules / advise In the book are impractical and unrealistic. That book came out when I was in my senior year of HS and I know a lot of my peers flocked to it as a cheat code to understanding how men thought but honestly I never liked or agreed with it. I felt and still feel like that mentality makes you lose what makes you a woman, you lose yr femininity..The very thing that attracts men to us In the first place. In my generation (I’m assuming you’re all older women ? ) it’s just a fast track to being a slut. I csnt speak on oldder women but girls my age jjst use that “i think like a man” slogan as an excuse to sleep around, detach mentaly and emotionally from relationships, and never fully engage in the man. It’s like competing for who can be the better man…. competing with your man to see who can be the better man. So frequently they’re laughed at, mocked, ridiculed but it’s so ingrained they believe thinking like a man is synonymous with being a strong or intelligent woman.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ladydacreme says:

      Cynthia you hit the nail on the head with your last statement; many women believe thinking like a man is synonymous to being strong and intelligent. It Is not!!! I find it hilarious that women rushed to buy a book written by a man, telling them how they should think and act. I did not buy the book, never even laid my eyes on it. I agree with the fact that women, in their attempts to think like men, are disconnecting themselves emotionally from relationships, acting like it’s cool to have sex with whoever and act like it doesn’t mean a thing. What a waste of the woman in them!

      Like

      • cyntiaonuoha says:

        My points exactly yet if I say this I’m 1. A prude 2. A woman hater. I’ve seriously been ATTACKED viciously by woman of my age and my mother’s age for staying exactly what you said just now.

        I found the book insulting. Sorry Steve but what do you know about being a woman ? Has he ever had to deal with the stigmas, expectations, constant sexualization, limits, rule etc etc that’s comes with a vagina ? So how can he tell me what to do let alone think ?

        Liked by 1 person

        • ladydacreme says:

          Lol! Women that are insecure are quick to accept any proposed ideology before even weighing it and its downstream effects. I think the root of all this is the fact that many women don’t know who they are. They believe they are created to care for the fragile egos of men that are insecure with themselves. It is so sad! I believe you and I belong to the same age group. These days, women believe being respectable and secure in yourself makes you a prude. I guess Steve Harvey’s book achieved its intention- to make women think like insecure men.

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          • cyntiaonuoha says:

            I believe / hope he has good intentions in his basic message of 1. Don’t sleep around 2. Give people a chance 3. Don’t be stuck up bitch but that about all the good I can take from it. Granted I only watched the movie and even then I thought it was stupid / a joke and ONLY a joke ..never to be take seriously. I mean didn’t one of the girls on the 30 day rile have to wear ugly under war just to stop herself form having sex.. -___- of you really have no self control and the only way to stop yr self is through possible embarrassment you need a lot more help than any book can offer.

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  2. ingesaunders says:

    I’ve read only a couple of pages of the book, skipped a few chapters, read a few chapters & like 3 Talks Noleen concluded: Harvey’s book is aimed at a certain demographic of women, in a certain continent, with a certain social background and moral attitude. Not me here in SA who’ve had ‘acting like a lady’ spoon fed to her with her mother’s milk *laughs* I’m sorry so not a face of the book. It spends half the book trying to teach women to be women (by a man no less) and the other half teaching women to ‘think like a man’ …Oh & I skipped the movie because the book was so disappointing. I agree with you Demi, difference between the sesxes is good. The problem comes in with self-worth & letting men get away with murder. Many women know why they’re single, they just don’t want to admit *shaking head* Thinking like a man aint gonna change that, only turn you into a lesser version of yourself. Cause once again, here’s a man tell you, being you, aint enough! Preach it!lol

    Like

    • ladydacreme says:

      Lol Inge. I never read the book; never even laid my eyes on a hard copy. It’s hilarious that so many women rushed to buy that book, yet they are still single. No man wants to date another man! The movie is funny, period. At the end, I did not have any urge to go buy the book or pen down any lessons from the movie.

      Like

      • ingesaunders says:

        Ha! I know right, a friend emailed me a e-book version of the book. I was doing my Honors at the time & literally went ‘what da hell?!’ Because 1) I don’t read self-help books 2) I didn’t need dating advice and 3) didn’t have any inclination to want to ‘act like a man’. Makes me think of that hilarious romcom featuring Mel Gibson where he suddenly can hear what women think. It’s the mystery between the sexes we like. It’s what makes us come back every time 🙂 If I was in a man’s head all the time…sheesh….nah …& how am I gonna be all cute when I’m acting like a man!lol no way! Ha!

        Like

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