God Sends Help Before You need It

There was a time in my life when I thought I would die from every bad situation I faced. I often told myself, in the midst of difficulty, that there was no way I was going to make it out so it was in my best interest to bend my back, let the situation sit on me until I could no longer breathe… until recently.

For those of you who may not be aware, my car was stolen three days after my PhD graduation. I am specific about the time it was stolen to help you understand how potentially crippling the situation could be. I was on a good high, celebrating the completion of a degree that had me questioning myself over and over and finally adding that ‘Dr’ title to my name. And right in the midst of all that, my car was stolen from a parking lot, and I was left wondering about ow I was going to get to work.

I told myself I could not live down the height of embarrassment that was about to follow me. I thought I could not survive the thought of going from a car-owning student to a bus-hailing PhD holder. I thought “Oh dear! The devil is about to have a field day at my expense. How was I going to tell people about how much God loves me, when I was unable to explain the fact that a car I had driven for six years without any event was stolen on the happiest week of my life?

Well, I did not die. I did not sink. I did not even bend. Surely, I was sad, but my sadness was often shortlived as I remembered the passage the holy spirit shared with me a month before my car was stolen.

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not lack any good thing. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in the path of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for God is with me. His rod and his staff, they comfort me. He prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies. He anoints my head with oil, my cup runs over. Surely, the goodness and mercy of God will follow me, all the days of my life and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever and ever. Amen” – Psalm 23.

It did not seem like much when I woke up on the morning of my birthday and the Lord dropped this on my heart. It seemed like a little more when a pastor friend of mine called me that morning and started our conversation with this passage, but still not enough for me to think too deeply about it. Afterall, it was just psalm 23. I had heard it over and over. What else was there to it?

In retrospect, I realize this was a seed God was planting ahead to give me strength for the day of trouble. It was a covering God sent out a month ahead to prepare me for the days I could not live down the misfortune of losing my car. It was a reassurance of love before the event that would cause me to doubt his love. It was comfort before the tears, relief before the pain, reassurance before the doubt.

I don’t know what you might be facing at this point. Perhaps it feels like God has forgotten you exist and you feel hurt that he let certain things happen to you. Don’t lose hope. Don’t think he has forgotten you. Sit back and think back… He sent you a covering before the storm. And if you are struggling to locate it, I encourage you to remember that the Lord is YOUR shepherd. You shall NOT LACK any good thing!

God bless you! XOXO

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Now I See Me…

It has taken years for me to arrive at this point – a point where I look at everyone and everything I thought I lost and said to myself “but truly, they had to go because if they did not, I would not be where or who I am today.” This epiphany hit me like a ton of bricks. It was sudden, unexpected, shocking, yet enlightening.

For years, I had sacrificed myself at the altar of approval. I chased down what I thought I needed to the detriment of my own sanity. I sacrificed my heart over and over, with the hope that these sacrifices would be enough to convince subjects of my affection to reciprocate my affection for them. But that did not happen. The more I sacrificed, the more I lost myself; not because sacrifices are synonymous to loss, but because I was cutting myself for things and people who did not care I was bleeding. In retrospect, I cannot blame them for not noticing. I could barely see myself bleeding. I was so focused on what I believed would be the perfect compensation, that I failed to realize how much of myself was bleeding out for affections I yearned for but did not deserve.

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Don’t get me wrong. I did not deserve them, not because I was insufficient, but because they were insufficient to satisfy me and take me where I needed to be. I did not deserve the nonchalance with which they would have treated me, or the emptiness they would have constantly poured into my life. I did not deserve the pain they would have brought or the feelings of insecurity they would have happily fostered in my spirit. I did not deserve these but I also did not know because I could not see me. I was so focused on seeing them as I wanted them to be, rather than seeing them as they were.

But today, it hit me. Like a blinding ray of sunlight hits the eyes when the blinds are pulled back without warning, so did the image of me hit my consciousness. Here I am, gloriously and beautifully created, crafted in the gentle hands of God, filled with the beauty of his grace and blessed with the power only his love can give. For love in its truest form only seeks to empower. In true love, there is no fear of loss. There is no fear that requires me to constantly contort myself for the sake of pleasing. There is simply no fear.

Now I see me – who I am, what I am and who I can become. I see me and I realize with peace in my heart that everything and everyone I lost was insufficient for where I am meant to be.

Now I see me, and I hope you see you too.

He who finds a wife…

“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22).

I have heard this bible verse so many times that I often find myself reciting it automatically to men that have an aversion to marriage. I recited it without really thinking there was any depth to it. I’ve heard it at almost every wedding I’ve attended, at church seminars for singles, at meetings organised to uplift women and help them build their self-esteem in their relationships… Yeah that bible verse has been around so that explains why it’s been stuck in my head even though I barely understood it.

I never gave it much thought until recently. Being on strict bed rest and unable to do anything remotely energy-consuming, I entertained myself with my thoughts, ‘regurgitating’ some conversations I had with friends. Slowly, a trend started to form in my mind as I remembered conversations I had with many of my married male friends. After the wedding, many of them had testimonies to share- better jobs, new houses, better cars, great financial stability etc.

This bible verse popped into my mind as I thought about those conversations and something became clear. Proverbs 18:22 wasn’t a verse by King Solomon simply to uplift women, it was a fact that this king who was richly blessed with wisdom had noticed during his time!

He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from God… In my interpretation, “he who marries God’s daughter (a woman after God’s heart, a woman who trusts God fully, a woman who is led by God in every step she takes) finds a good thing and obtains favour from God. Well, why wouldn’t he?

Imagine if you married the daughter of a businessman who owned various companies across the country? If you were living a good life before your wedding, you can be assured that you’ll live a much better life after the wedding because such a father wouldn’t want his daughter to lack anything. How much more our God that owns the heavens and the earth in all its entirety?

A male friend of mine that recently got married confided in me that his wedding cost 35,000 dollars- an amount that caused him to stagger when he first heard the budget. But somehow, things started falling into place. He had been struggling to get a job but after sealing the deal, a top position in a foreign country opened and he got it, he got a beautiful new car, he got more money than expected from his research group, he became blessed in every way…. I smiled as he testified to God’s goodness- he married God’s daughter.

You might be wondering….’How do I know she’s God’s daughter?’ Well, here are some things I know:

God’s daughter is beautiful inside and out, she has a heart of gold, she’s ready to give, ready to support, she’s thankful even when life offers sour lemons, she lives by God’s word, she praises Him even when she’s being tormented by the devil.

God’s daughter is not lazy; she doesn’t sit around and expect everything to be handed out to her! She gets up every morning with a plan to do something great with herself. God’s daughter is decent in her appearance, she is decent with her language, she doesn’t curse and swear at everyone on the street. God’s daughter is imperfect and she knows it but she accepts her imperfections and believes there’s a lot for God to carve into her.

God’s daughter is a pillar of strength to her man. She is ready to fight their relationship battles in prayer, she is loving, selfless and kind. No matter how successful she is, she is humble and submissive, though she’s assertive and strong when the need arises.

It is a proven fact! When you marry God’s daughter, he has no choice than to bless you richly. He doesn’t want the apple of his eye to lack anything so he will fill your heart and home with joy! This is not to say men are not precious to God. We all are, irrespective of gender but you have to agree with me, there must be something special about a woman that made King Solomon write that verse.

“He who finds a wife (not a selfish woman, not a woman driven only by the pleasures of this world, not a woman who’s too lazy to even have aspirations for her future, not a woman who’s only there for the good times, but a woman who understands the sanctity of marriage and walks with her hand in God’s hands all the time) finds a good thing and obtains favour from God!

Merry christmas in advance dear followers and visitors. May this season bring you all great happiness and blessings in all your endeavours.

Do share your thoughts about this verse! I would like to know what you think. God bless!